Hello again. Here we are with the third newsletter!
Thank you, again, for your excellent feedback and
suggestions. It is truly wonderful hearing from those
of you who have been sent the newsletter from
other friends or colleagues. Welcome to the widening
circle of folks who are more and more connected.
This "linking" will help me respond to the kinds of
questions and concerns you have so please keep it
up. (see Send A Friend button below).
I'll continue to share thoughts, Sanity Savers and
information about articles, appearances, publications,
interviews, and seminars on a variety of topics.
Wishing you health, peace and balance.
Some people look forward to the whole
intergenerational clan experience as a great
opportunity for everyone to get to know each other
in a relaxed and easy manner and others think that
those two words, "family" and "vacation" cannot
coexist in the same sentence.
Here are some Sanity Savers to keep in mind
next family adventure:
- Plan ahead as best you can. Discover what is
available at the place you are going (activities,
proximity to religious institutions, parks, restaurants,
- Decide the best room arrangements and
accommodations. Do you want to be next door to
parents? Consider privacy issues.
- Everyone needs time alone to recharge. That long
solo sunrise walk along the beach is worth
getting up for.
- Pair people in the family who have similar
so they can have private time together.
- Use the opportunity to stay connected to your
mate. Sometimes it is difficult to demonstrate
your loyalty when you feel torn between your
parents, siblings and your spouse. Take time to be
- For meals and other group outings, decide
beforehand what is being paid for and by whom.
- Share caregiving of the children. Decide how
responsibilities will be divided.
- And for fun and a sense of camaraderie, offer
everyone a TEE shirt or hat with the family name.
You can also designate one person as the family trip
March 12, 2005
"Self Image: A Workshop in Progress"
Women's Images Conference, Fairfield, CT
March 14, 2005 8pm
"Parents and Their Adult Children: It's Never Too Late
to Make it Better."
Cosmopolitan Club, NYC
March 18, 2005
"Keeping Your Balance: Parents and Professionals
Learning from One Another as they Provide the Best
for Difficult Children"
Young Adult Institute, NYC
|Wedding Sanity Savers
New Book with Annie Gilbar
My new book, co-authored with Annie
Gilbar, Wedding Sanity Savers:
How to Handle the Stickiest Dilemmas, Scrapes, and
Questions that Arise on the Road to Your Perfect
will be in bookstores
on June 7th but you can pre-order it today
by clicking below.
Addressing the psychological pitfalls that go with
getting married, Wedding Sanity Savers
shares questions and answers from my advice
column on WeddingChannel.com and offers brides,
grooms and their families a helpful guide during the
|Dr. Dale's Website has a New Look!
Spring will soon be here and I've been doing a bit of
pre-spring cleaning of my own.
DrDaleAtkins.com has a new, fresh, look. It is
easier to navigate and highlights "What's New."
Click below to the new Home Page and let me know
what you think. Email firstname.lastname@example.org.
|TIPS for Your Marriage
While Raising a Child Who Has Extra Needs
The key for couples living with a child who has extra
needs is finding a "new normalcy"; one that works for
both you and your spouse. Dealing with the
challenges that are raised by having a child who has
extra needs can serve to strengthen a relationship
that is already strong or can tear at the fabric of a
There are more demands put on
everyone in families with kids who have extra needs
there are new and different worries and concerns.
More than ever, couples need to feel appreciated
and their efforts acknowledged. Since progress is
often slower than parents would like, focusing on
what YOUR child does is essential, rather than
comparing to other children in the neighborhood.
Here are some TIPS to keep your
marraige on track while giving to the needs of
- Realize that your child is a whole child who
happens to have a disability. The disability does not
define your child, you or your family.
- Take care of yourself and one another, and when
needed, develop other sources of support and
interests (separately and together) while nurturing
your relationship apart from your child.
- Pay attention to the positive aspects of your life
and your relationship, determining ways to
acknowledge each other's effort and value.
- Share the journey of learning about your child's
diagnosis and what will be required of you as a family
(whenever possible attend classes, meetings, medical
and educational appointments together).
- Help each other and re-examine your roles based
on what is needed for your relationship to thrive.
- Guilt and worry do nothing to enhance your time
together. Give yourselves specific opportunities to
share your feelings and concerns. That way you can
maximize enjoyment during your free time
- You and your spouse will adapt in different ways.
Respect, understand and try to share this
|I'm OK, You're My Parents
Now in Paperback
I'm Ok, You're My Parents: How to Overcome
Guilt, Let Go of Anger, and Create a Relationship
That Works is now in paperback!
DALE V. ATKINS Ph.D. is a licensed psychologist,
lecturer and media commentator who appears
on the Today show.
She has more than twenty-
years of experience as a relationship expert,
focusing on families, couples, parenting, aging well
and stress management.
Dr. Atkins is the author
and/or co-editor of several books including
Sisters; From the Heart: Men and
Their Private Thoughts about their Private Lives;
Families and their Hearing-Impaired Children;
OK, You're My Parents and the soon to be
Wedding Sanity Savers.
Find out more....